Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. The purpose in starting this blog is to give me an outlet for what I am going through at this point in my life. I hope that others can share their experiences, strength ad hope if they have gone through this journey, which I will share more about later. I will also be writing about other things that take up space in my mind. Just a side note; I will be using my nickname and initials to protect other’s privacy.
I am a 38 yr old mother of a 19 yr old son. I am a devout christian. I am also going through a divorce, not of my choosing. My husband of 16 yrs left me back in August of 2009, much to my shock and amazement. I knew that things were not great between us. We had communication issues and financial issues. But never did I think he would come home from work one day and tell me he was leaving, especially after he had told me a few weeks earlier that he told someone we were doing okay.
Shortly after he left I discovered he had started drinking again and smoking marijuana behind my back. I was not surprised, as a wife we have that intuition that something just isn’t right, but we can’t quite put our finger on it. Friends of ours had know this, but didn’t tell me because, as they say, “they didn’t know how”. As you can imagine, I felt humiliated. I felt stupid because I was his wife, I should have known.
About a month after he left, I was sitting at my computer, having a coffee and puttering around on the net. I see a vehicle pull up and someone in the passenger side lean over for a few seconds, and then get out. That man was my husband. I put two and two together and when he got to the door, I asked him who it was. He told me and I asked if he was seeing her. He said yes. You cannot begin to imagine the grief, humiliation and anger that came over me. How could he have his mistress drop him off in front of the house we shared for years?
There is much more to the story. I want to share this because in many churches today, divorce is seen as the ultimate sin. I do not believe it is, and I will write about that later. I welcome your comments as I walk through this journey with God by my side. However, to make it perfectly clear, I will not accept comments about divorce is sin, comments about divorce and remarriage being adultery, how God hates divorce. But that is also a discussion for another time. This place is for encouragement and support, I intent to keep it that way.
I am a 38 yr old mother of a 19 yr old son. I am a devout christian. I am also going through a divorce, not of my choosing. My husband of 16 yrs left me back in August of 2009, much to my shock and amazement. I knew that things were not great between us. We had communication issues and financial issues. But never did I think he would come home from work one day and tell me he was leaving, especially after he had told me a few weeks earlier that he told someone we were doing okay.
Shortly after he left I discovered he had started drinking again and smoking marijuana behind my back. I was not surprised, as a wife we have that intuition that something just isn’t right, but we can’t quite put our finger on it. Friends of ours had know this, but didn’t tell me because, as they say, “they didn’t know how”. As you can imagine, I felt humiliated. I felt stupid because I was his wife, I should have known.
About a month after he left, I was sitting at my computer, having a coffee and puttering around on the net. I see a vehicle pull up and someone in the passenger side lean over for a few seconds, and then get out. That man was my husband. I put two and two together and when he got to the door, I asked him who it was. He told me and I asked if he was seeing her. He said yes. You cannot begin to imagine the grief, humiliation and anger that came over me. How could he have his mistress drop him off in front of the house we shared for years?
There is much more to the story. I want to share this because in many churches today, divorce is seen as the ultimate sin. I do not believe it is, and I will write about that later. I welcome your comments as I walk through this journey with God by my side. However, to make it perfectly clear, I will not accept comments about divorce is sin, comments about divorce and remarriage being adultery, how God hates divorce. But that is also a discussion for another time. This place is for encouragement and support, I intent to keep it that way.
I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your marriage. I can understand that being a devastating blow, and coming to terms with it from a religious stand point difficult enough without judgement. I hope you're able to find peace and that your journey here helps you to get back on the path that's right for you.
ReplyDeleteThank you. Some days I'm ok, some, not so much. But I am learning a lot about me, so I guess that is good.
ReplyDelete